I conquered my fear of Youtube!/ SongExpo2017

I conquered my fear of Youtube!/ SongExpo2017

Hi guys,

It feels like forever since I posted last! How are ya?

Well, Im currently in Norway on a writing trip at the Songexpo2017.


Songexpo 2017, Trondhiem Norway          

This is the 7th year of SongExpo & writers from all over the world get together for a week of creating records. Many songs from past SongExpo’s have been cut, released & have charted so its an amazing opportunity to be a part of.



Che Pope, Grammy winning producer &  Fmr President of G.O.O.D Music (Kanye West)



I got to work with Che Pope from the US. Che is a grammy winner who worked of one of THE GREATEST ALBUMS OF ALL TIME (in my opinion) The mis-education of Lauryn Hill so I was super excited to write with him







The super talented Singer & writer Martin Mulholland 


I also got to write with dope singer/writer Martin Mulholland & incredibly dope Korean Producer Called Deez. I Honestly  made the stink face (when the beat is just nasty) so many times. Listening to his music You would  think  Deeze grew up in a black church somewhere in America instead of Seoul Korea.



I finally did something i’ve been alittle scared to do for a long time, & thats make a youtube video. The crazy thing is, I actually love it. I’m that super subscriber, who learns everything from nerdy tech stuff to hair tutorials! (Not to mention I love a good family Vlog Jamie and Nikki is life).

I bought a point & shoot & a DSLR camera a while back & fear put the brakes on me posting any of the pics & footage I’d shot. I literally came to Norway purely with the intention of writing so I left my camera equiptment at home & headed to Gatwick.


Ok so I’m doing the goodreads reading challenge & really trying hard to hit my target this year & I’m currently reading ‘Year of yes’ by Shonda Rhimes, (whom Im a huge fan of) & the weirdest thing happened when I got to page 79. The words


                          DITCH THE DREAM BE A DOER NOT A DREAMER


Hit me as if she had pointed a gun & fired the words directly at me herself. They aren’t particularly profound words, but they resonated with me. & I finally got up the nerve to do my first youtube video. It’s not the greatest quality as I was unprepared & shot it with the selfie camera but the point was just to do it. Now its done, I no longer fear it.

I have this bad habit I’m working on braking, but I build something up in my head until it creeps me out & haunts me. Today I conquered this youtube monster with the help of my gladiator in a suit Ms Rhimes, now i’m actually excited to start this experiment & conquer the next fear. Here’s to day 1 of a Year of yes!

Happy Construction

A x 💋

Check out my impromptu video oh & as the youtubers saySubscribe-PNG-6



  1. July 5, 2017 / 23:27

    I’m glad you got to do your first youtube video
    I hope to get the courage to start mine soon
    Nice video

  2. July 6, 2017 / 01:41

    YASSSS!! I am so happy for you that you have conquered your fears! It is so funny how one little thought can turn into doubt and then that doubt in to fear. This is inspiring 🙂

  3. July 6, 2017 / 07:42

    Yaaasss! I love this confidence! You made a nice, “”short and sweet” post, which is generally what has held me back from videos. You’re off to a great start darling!

    • Ayak
      July 10, 2017 / 16:14

      Thank you. I thought the more concise the less pressure. Then I actually enjoyed it. Come on & join in. I’ll subscribe!

  4. July 6, 2017 / 17:06

    YAY for you! I have that book and I seriously need to finish it! It sounds like you found your “sea legs” and running with it. I need to do better at getting my YT up and running. Thanks for the inspiration!

  5. July 6, 2017 / 19:51

    Congratulations on your first YouTube video! I love the quote about being a doer and not a dreamer! I totally Agree!

  6. July 6, 2017 / 19:59

    Congrats on starting your Youtube channel. You’ll do wonderfully. I have a friend who read Shonda Rhymes book and she thought it was life-changing.

  7. July 7, 2017 / 01:57

    Congrats. I also love that book. This reminds me that I need to re-read it. Also, YouTube is fun if you have the time. I actually miss doing videos.

  8. Kita
    July 7, 2017 / 02:17

    COngats on your first video. I definitely love Year of Yes. Such an amazing book.

  9. July 7, 2017 / 05:43

    What a dope experience. The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill is legendary. I remember when it came out, I played it nonstop. All these years later it still rocks, start to finish.

  10. Jay Colby
    July 7, 2017 / 14:15

    Congrats on your first video. I’m happy you’ve gotten over your fear and started your YouTube channel.

  11. July 7, 2017 / 17:29

    Yes sometimes to accomplish our dreams/goals is to just do it. Glad you conquered your fear and made your first youtube video. I have heard great things about the Shonda Rhimes book, I need to look into reading it.

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